"many are called, few are chosen, and even fewer are found faithful."

this thing has been resounding in my mind for a while, and it came up again during SOS.

i wept, and to tell the truth, i dunno why i did.

but i do know that i was overwhelmed.

was sharing with her, how years ago, this thing came to my mind, and i was telling God, what if i "drop out". through my yrs in church, there had been so many that "dropped out", will i be one of those?

then after some time, God told me, "xiaoting, you are my chosen one".

i could not believe it then. i asked God if He is sure.

a few years later, what i heard is "many are called, few are chosen, and even fewer are found faithful".

to many, this is so foolish. soooo foolish. to the intellectual, xiaoting is an idiot. i am so trapped in this, there's no turning back. is it worth it even?

many have left. this is one of those times, i felt so much abt xinhong's blog. it totally resonated with what i am feeling inside.

i just want to say,

to you, it may be foolishness. i know. to majority of the people, yes. sometimes you do make me feel that i am so silly. sometimes i wonder if i am right. but do you know, i really love Him so much, that i don't want to forego anything. i don't mind being a fool for Him. i really don't want to be called, yet not be chosen, or worse, not be found faithful.

and i feel sad, when you don't resonate with me.

really.

she asked me tdy, why? i told her, because He asked. it's as simple as that isn't it? if He asked, i will give up even the most precious things, in exchange for Him.

i'm not saying you r wrong, we all have our paths and ways, but i have decided a long time back.

there's no turning back. i will live, lay down my life, and walk this path of "foolishness".

i will be a fool for Christ.