haix. feeling a bit sad cos i got Ungraded for my LEP S paper. Geez.. jus now was feeling rather erm.. dunno how to say but now better.

i havent been a good girl.. jus now read my script. it is really not that good u noe.. yah. acty quite bad i think.. sometimes i feel really quite sad. cos i think that i really have no wen bi? dunno y i m in lep.. n i dunno wad i m doing also. toking abt liking chinese so much but really in me, there is no substance to tok abt? haix.

anyway.. jus want to say that i love hwa chong!!! today mr chow played us the 30th anniversary vcd.. well u can say that it is trying to stir up our emotions or something.. but den when i was watching it.. i really cried. with tears flowing down my cheeks non-stop. i really love this sch, love huang cheng, love lep, love the sch compound, love 61, love mr chow, love all my tutors, love my lovely lep tutors, every single one of them. to be honest, i din noe i love this place so much. it is like my home away from home.. besides home, besides chc, this is the place. geez. all the cheering, the songs..

突然发现我可以用华文打字了。好开心。用华文写字然我又开心又难过知道吗？这是我敬爱的语言，文学，可是却对自己很失望，因为爱它只是挂在口中的事，我却没有上进心，没有力求进步，是不是应该拖出去问斩？我会做的，也只不过是苦读LEP罢了，但是我并没有为这股热忱做什么。该当何罪？现代人应该有很多会说不会做的人吧，可恨的是我竟然渐渐地成为其中之一。在德明的时候以为自己有一点了不起，来到华初，真的是小巫见大巫。不对，我应该连小巫都不如吧，口语化的句子，不够简练的语言，晓亭，如果连基本都不会，请不要再谈中华文学。五千年的历史，凭什么由你这个红毛丫头说得算？

失望。泄气。由谁能带来一盏灯，重新点燃心中的火，让我能再次燃烧起来？

对。我爱华初。我爱华文。我爱语特。只但愿这不是说说而已。