a song for myself, and for u my fren.

每一天都有一些事即将会发生
每段路都有即将要来的路程
每颗心都有值得期待的成份
每个人都有爱上另一个人的可能
相爱就不能害怕会有伤痕
没有人完整却有人能信任 才找到永恒

想到达明天现在就要启程
只有你能带我走向未来的旅程
想到达明天现在就要启程
你能让我看见黑夜过去
天开始明亮的过程

it has been so loong since i blogged.

today i was on my way to ikea. and i got down 2 stops before. it wasn't intentional, and i had to walk a long way to get there. din mind it though, i think i need some time to clear my head.

as i was walking, i heard Him speak. my eyes watered and the vision was blurred. and He said, there's so much more in store, and He held my hand.

记得很久以前的自己，是个爱思考的晓亭，真的。i used to do reflections all the time. 我最讨厌的， 是做一个普通的人。我讨厌普通，讨厌平常，讨厌原封不动，讨厌停滞不前。但是，为什么在我没有发现的情况下，我却渐渐让自己停留在现在。

我需要重新规划我的人生。

this few days have been busy busy cos xmas is coming. aren't u excited? i m! n to make it better, i have new clothes. haha.

i always love the end of the yr, cos it's a time of reflections and thanksgiving, to really look back at what God has done in my life and in the cg, n it's also a time for new hopes and dreams. i m really look forward to 2008. i wanna grow more than ever before and to really come up to another level.

visions and dreams for 2008.

growth n multiplication.

disciples being raised up.

dreams n destinies fulfilled.

people come and people go.

i have learnt that.

and i have learnt, i dun have to be helpless abt it.

when it's time to let go, i will.

readily, willingly, spontaneously.

有些人在你生命中只是个过客，该放手时，就潇洒一点吧。 :)

a chapter is closing, another chapter is beginning.

i m looking forward to 2008. another great yr.

love You!

恶作剧之吻2放映了！呵呵。我刚看了第一集。赞！

有这么一个时候，我曾经问过我自己，如果再发生多一次，我会怎么做，我可以承担吗？

而当时，我给自己的答案是，一定不会发生的。

我想我错了吧。

我以为我可以的，我以为会很容易的，我却发现，并不是这样的。

我很想允许自己脆弱，允许自己掉泪，允许自己自艾自怜，但是，我知道事实不是这样的。

这是一次我真的不知要跟谁说，我需要你聆听的耳朵。

晓亭会不会很感情用事？

是不是太感性？

要我用那铁做的心肠去，我真的做不到。

我可以装着一切都 ok，在夜深人静时，我知道，其实并不是这样的吧。

i will move on. ok?

i missed blogging, missed my laptop. :)

came back feeling heavy-hearted. different things have been happening n i m really exhausted.

breakaway n ignited have been fantastic, although i m really tired.

to add on to that, all the burdens for those different ppl made me heavy.

plus uncle admitted into hospital. and spending many of my evenings there. i wanna be there.

God gave me a wonderful passage last night. thank You.

thank you to MY leaders. u guys are fantastic. i love the times spent with you.

thank you to Sunday (Saturday) boyz. i think u all shld be called Sunday boyz really. becos you guys nv fail to brighten up my Sundays. thank you. it's great that i dun have to say or do anything. i simply enjoy the fellowship. u all may not know what is running thru my mind n life, but your presence and the joy that you bring brightens me every wk. i love my Sundays becos of you, and of cos, becos of Him and His house.

i realised i m really learning to love, and i m loving my members more. but that also means sth else.

to sum it up all, xiaoting is tired. i really nd to tok to somebody but i dunno who. i nd my break. ppl who r supposed to go OS tog, can we pls quickly plan?

xmas is coming. it's gonna be great.

we will end this yr well.

i feel the devil is hitting me left right up down n centre. i dun feel defeated, but i feel tired. i dun have that strength to retaliate. i nd a good break to get up and fight again. i sprained my shoulder, my finger, and maybe my ankle. pray for me won't you? i will walk thru victorious. and i will.

i m feeling upset. n i dun dare to tok to anybody. boohoohoo. n i dun wan to be at home!

过了这么久，我开始更加清楚地看清事实。

记得一开始，有人告诉我，是不需要担心的，因为是短暂的。会过去的。

我勉强相信。到底，人总是需要一个希望的。即使这个希望不明显，只要有一丁点儿，我都宁愿抓住不放。

但是时间过去了。

一切的一切让我更加清楚。我一直以为我很了解的。我也一直很相信的。但是，我对自己也越来越没有信心了。

其实，我不明白的事情有这么多。

不明白他为何能对朋友那么残酷，不明白他怎么能说出如此狠心的话，之后却当着什么也没发生。不明白他为何如此践踏友情，不明白他怎么能把别人的关心当作是理所当然的。

一时的迷失，我可以接受的。

但是，如果是人品的改变，我不可以。

我可以接受人有弱点，我也愿意等到你改变。

但是，如果变得自私，自我，不顾别人的感受，这已经在我能接受的范围之外了。

那某人又说，是时候放手了。

奇怪，说暂时的人是他，叫我松手的人也是他。

我不敢松手，因为我怕我会后悔。

但是。。

我却不知该如何不放手。。

亲爱的读者，如果你能够告诉我，我应该怎么做，我会很开心的。

this SUPER BIG thing happened tdy. wad? i m not gonna tell u. haha. ok this is childish. na, as usual, if u ask me, i will.

anw, i was jus reminded of how good God is.

i remember, if this happened 1/2 yr ago, or 1 yr ago, u will get a totally different reaction from xiaoting.

but tdy, i can say, i m really ok. :) and my frens will testify to that.

there wasn't any anger or sorrow, really, but more concerned for the readers. my God will stand up for me.

and thanks to my frens who readily encouraged. n i told ce. perhaps in the past i would not be like that. but God really strengthened my heart. and i m glad. i used to think i cannot go thru attacks like that. God showed me all things r possible.

we r busy. very. in the natural n in the spiritual.

but God is still very good.

there r times that i m apprehensive. but when i read it, i was thinking. sth great is really going to take place. that is y the devil is trying so hard. n everybody agreeed, it's so random! :)

n in my mind i was jus concerned abt sth else. n i read your blog.

tears used to well up. but this time, it's for a totally different reason.

thank You for showing me it's all worth it.

i m so proud of u girl.

特地为了看“康熙来了”，这个时间才睡。当然，来宾是小猪。

我以前并不能够完全明白，为什么很多人觉得康永哥很厉害。看了这集后，我了解了。

哈哈。

他对小猪和 selina 的逼供，是厉害的。

而从这集，你当然也可以看出一些头绪来。

Selina 真的有快招架不住，小猪真的很不正常。哈哈。你看到小猪这一面，还真的觉得有点奇怪。他认真得有点尴尬。

和 selina 跳舞那一段，他说忘记了。hmm.. 哈哈。整个东西就很有破绽。

i m just amazed. :)

sometimes, no matter how hard people try to cover up, there is still wad u call, "truth" after all.

你的感情，或许会出卖你吧。:) 这是我个人的感觉。it's just a feel n assumption. dun take it too seriously k.

it's weird. i m sitting in long john blogging. haha. cos i had a craving for long john tdy after today's fasting. haha. :) we had a good time praying.

anw, i did sth really exciting tdy. haha. to weijian. but i feel i should not write out the conversation. even though i m very very tempted to. haha. if u ask me in private wad happened, i promise u i will tell u. maybe.

hahha. wj u totally brightened up my day. although i din get to tok to u much nowadays, that one conversation is enough to blow me up!!! haha. thank you. although u were unwilling.

chan eng scolded me. cos she said i abuse my influence. wahahaha. wj did i? she was saying it's very scary to do that. haha. i agree.

i m a busy busy. but happy happy girl. :)

ok. here it goes.

其实，对于小猪的演唱会，我并没有很多很多要说的。

我忘了有没有说过，要看他的演唱会，是因为这是他的第一次，我想分享这个第一次。

看了台湾演唱会的片段后，我不敢对新加坡的有很大的希望，因为我不要失望。

芳已经给了我 warning，新加坡不会那么好。

也对啦。

奇怪的是，那天有好多人到场，都抱着一种“看个究竟”的心态。我不了解。他们是很有钱，然后来看看吗？

新加坡缺少了那种疯狂，这也是所以演唱会的气氛，不会那么的好。but i still enjoyed myself.

小猪唱了那些我们都懂的歌啦，像精舞门，shake it mama shake it, 幸福猎人，chance chance，等等。

他的舞技，依旧是很精湛，歌声，也没有我想象的不好，所以都是不错的。

只是来看演唱会的人不够热情，情绪无法 high 到极点。这是一点点遗憾。

芳希望这场演唱会能很感人，但是少了全心支持他的人，有点困难吧。

但是说实在的，当我听小猪唱好朋友，唱我不会唱歌，我心里确实浮上了一阵感动。

他的真诚，他的认真，在整个商业化底下，还是能够感受到的。

虽然新加坡的歌迷，不能真的感受到那种气氛，但是他的真诚，认真，努力，是有目共睹的。

我，看到了。

it's an experience, really. my first time really paying n going for a concert. 我本来真的真的很兴奋，但是，常常到了actual thing，我总会以平常心对待。only exception is God-related stuff. i will always be excited till the end. i was full of anticipation really, but when we went into indoor, i lost it. haha. i m always like that, i know myself. jus like how i really look forward to the end of exams, but when it has ended, there will never be a whoosh from xiaoting, it jus ended, lor.

yep so that is abt it. i will put up the pics n videos soon. btw, i got really 劲爆 photos of wanquan n yulan n ting.

this is where u see yulan in her "prettiest". stay tuned for more. hurhur.

i m gonna quickly blog and then go out n play. no la. i m getting my friends' beloved presents. hurhur.

虽然忙碌，可是我喜欢这种感觉。

记得在最忙碌的日子，和helen讲话时，我们总会谈到两个是如何喜欢这样fast-paced的life.

we thrive under stress. i think. haha.

我总是认为，最困苦，最忙的日子，会磨练你。

当然，不能盲目的为忙而忙。但是，这样的日子，对你的训练来说，是很棒的。

所以，我还是很开心的。Slack了这么久，可以整个人投入去做一件事情，是一个很棒的感觉。

those who know me, i dun believe anything is impossible. esp ce will noe. that is y i believe in making things happen.

but the last time pst yk toked abt yoido full gospel church, he said, u wun really feel that they tried very hard to make things happen. there is just a flow.

pst kong said yest. when u r connected with God, u can do GREAT things. i believe in that. n the need to get spiritual.

for the month of december, NEW things.

BREAKAWAY the old IGNITED with the new.

u believe it? i do.

just a side note, sometimes i will be very touched during service. n i will really cry in the presence of God. just like yest. He will come in a powerful way n fill me totally on the inside. and everytime i sit beside a friend, (nf that is) they will ask m i ok. sometimes it's kind of embarrassing, but i m pretty much used to it. hurhur. but it's quite funny ah. haha. at the end of the service they will be like, xiaoting r u ok? haha. it's jus sth funny.

anw, i was so excited. yest sze yin (wj's sis) sent me jw's pic. the service was JAMMED PACKED with ppl sitting on all the steps. i m just sooooo excited.

we r living for a time like this. n it is time to rise up, ppl.

i will tok abt xiao zhu soon. dun have time too. another day perhaps. n u may have to wait quite loong. haha.

it was somewhat physically tiring, but i was really really happy to get involved and be part of this.

there must be something greater in store.

BREAKAWAY the old IGNITED with the new.

我发现。。我是一个喜欢很早很早的早晨，和很夜很夜的夜晚的人。

刚才走在大路上，感觉着迎面而来的风，突然发现，我真的很喜欢这个时候，走路的感觉。

宽敞的大街，一个人独自走着。

换成是以前的我，总会在想很多事情。但是，今天的我，什么也没想，就这么走着。

有时候，身旁有许多值得我们去注意，去发现的东西。

不管是晚间的凉风，大街的灯光，在这个晚上，感觉异常特别。

考试完了，但是和往常一样，我并没有特别的放松。或许因为考试一直对我来说，都不是那么重要。生命里，对我而言，还有更多更重要的事。

不是不要付出，而是害怕伤害。

在付出真心和保护自己这两者，告诉我，你会选择什么。

我，迷上了你。迷上了夜里的你。迷上了爱思考的你。迷上了潇洒的你。

迷。上。了。你。

dun read too much into wad i m writing. it's really fictitious in some sense. allow me room, for imagination.

God is good. i was reading the Bible last time before slping. and God gave me this verse.

Ps 94:19

In the multitude of my anxieties within me, Your comforts delight my soul.

Dun u think it's a great verse for exam? haha. it took me thru my paper tdy.

Anyway tml is the last day already. i m gonna make it.

still studying at 130am. my eyes r really closing. i m struggling to stay awake. but 小猪's 爱转角brought back fond memories. and brought a smile to my face. jia you xiaoting.

i just ate this really cheap cup noodles that taste awfully nice. yummy.

it's weird that i have 3 papers tml n the day aft tml. but i m not the least urgent. oh gosh. xt work hard for the remaining days k?

to all of u. i will see u in 2 days' time. it's freedom calling me.

Ps 90:12 (NLT)

"Teach us to realize the brevity of life, so that we may grow in wisdom."

n that is y, i nd to live every day, moment, minute, second for You.

i nd to live for You.

半夜了，感觉有点累，但是却睡不着。

需要读书，但读不进。

i like this hour.

when i saw ur sms, i could not stop crying. thank u for ur love n concern.

thank you for letting me noe, that it matters. thank you.

i think it is amazing. that for the sake of understanding wad u r writing, i m acty navigating dictionary.com on the other side.

perhaps u r one of the very few who can make me do this.

but i still enjoy reading ur blog. :)

when i saw, i was reminded of how i felt always when i saw on the streets. that love n compassion for these ppl once again arose. God i did remember.

it seems like a faraway dream, but somehow i always wished, that these ppl would be touched.

and i thot, He gave me the desires of my heart.

the communication is not easy, the gap is big, but love can overcome all things.

i pray, You will use us, to make a difference.

lives waiting to be touched out there.

on another notes, jus want to say thank u to my cg members. u guys did an awesome job yest with the bbq. thanks for ur generous service n love towards others.

xiaoting is thankful. for great members like u guys, and for what He is doing.

it's Your kingdom, it's your glory.

unless the Lord build His hse, he who labours labours in vain.

so Lord, build Your hse.

just received a mail from my lecturer. i was sooooo encouraged. i did not find all the literary theories very simple, but i knew i really tried. and i enjoy thinking and reflecting and understanding the theories. my new fave is foucault. wahahaha. i think i m gonna read up more on him. he sounds so interesting. huhur. anyway, i really want to make use of the remaining time in uni. i wanna grow n expand. so gambathe!

i just realised. that in 7 days' time, i m finishing my exams. which also means it's the end of my year 3 sem 1. suddenly, i feel pretty nervous. not because of exams, but because this sem is ending. i kind of dun wan it to, because i have not given myself the chance to put in 100%, and i dun wan to leave uni regretting that i did not give my best.

i only have 10 modules left to fight for.

xiaoting..

in any case, i was mentally n emotionally prepared. BUT. my heart still sank when i saw the sms.

please help me.

i nd the grace n wisdom.

i m jus glad it's all over. and i dunno y, it feels loooong. can't wait for next thurs. but before the 29, i promise i will work hard. really.

does mugging make u tired? cos i m jus simply exhausted. aft a whole day of churning out reports.

i really just want to get it over and done with. really.

想好好的写一些东西。其实，很不喜欢的一件事，就是自己一直在做某件事情，却没有时间去思考自己的人生，这一点，或许跟某人很像吧。

最近很不喜欢思考，因为很讨厌自己在思考的当儿，带来的烦恼。要想的事情太多，越想会越烦，但是这样会导致我开始出现迟钝的状况。没有啦，是开玩笑的，但是如果在停止思考字的生活，应该真的会变笨吧。

talking to terence yest, and he said he totally agreed that i have become less D over the yrs and more I. I probably like myself more for the fact that I have become less D, becos i used to be really demanding and everything. But i really dun like myself for being more I. I can stand ppl being noisy but I can't stand myself being noisy. Wad an irony huh. U must be thinking.. xiaoting r u sure? becos i talk so much all the time. ya but sometimes i jus wish i really can talk less. hur.

I like myself with more 人情味, but i dislike the fact that i think i have become less disciplined over the years and giving myself more room for errors and mistakes. I dun like the fact that I have become less a thinker and more an enjoyer.

I think.. i need to do something more productive with my life.

The last semester, i pushed myself to the max, becos i jus wanted to stretch myself.

But this sem, after SOT, i thot i totally lost my momentum. I hoped i have not lost my cutting edge,

though more I, i want to retain my D-ness still. really. I can't stand low productivity and the wasting of one's life. I love people. but I want to do something more with my life. REALLY.

so i hope and pray I will get down to sth soon. that after this exams, i will make full use of my life. this has been a sem of rest n fun n what's not, and i think, it's time to get down to WORK.

pst once said, we all live to work u noe, and i need to get myself down to doing it.

XIAOTING. quit moping ard ur life.

我爱上这首歌。

总觉得“崇拜”好有意境。

歌词简单 漂亮

我存在你的存在

崇拜：

作词：陈没 作曲：彭学斌 编曲：陈建骐

你的姿态
你的青睐
我存在在你的存在
你以为爱就是被爱
你挥霍了我的崇拜
我活了 我爱了
我都不管了
心爱到疯了恨到酸了就好了
可能的 可以的 真的可惜了
幸福好不容易的怎么你却不敢了呢
我还以为我们能 不同于与别人
我还以为不可能的
不会不可能

你的姿态
你的青睐
我存在在你的存在
你以为爱就是被爱
你挥霍了我的崇拜
风筝有风
海豚有海
我存在在我的存在
所以明白
所以离开
所以不再为爱而爱
自己存在 在你之外

这次的感觉好不一样。

我已经学习如何坦然地去面对。

对自己的成长，我觉得好神奇啊。

不知不觉中，我已经长大了。

和一年前的自己，感觉是多么的不一样。

不是心如止水，是懂得去面对的。

他是信实的。

我还是需要智慧。

但是，这次，少了担心，焦虑和害怕。多了一份信心。

谢谢你。真的。

还有谢谢一位特别的先生。我好喜欢他给的advice.

encouraging n practical.

all things work tog for the good of those who love Him.

u believe it? i do. :)

off to my first exam.

keep me in ur prayers k?

i m quite glad it's starting. n will be over in no time.

突然对布拉格这个地方好有憧憬。其实，全世界当中，我最向往的一个地方是欧洲。

希望。。 有一天我可到那里backpacking。好幸福啊！

也希望我可以到欧洲度蜜月。:P (我知道，这样老公要很有钱哦！)

my heart melted when i saw the pics. u r in for a treat.

these r pictures of Prague, the capital city of Czech Republic.

I will be there one day. I can't wait!

o昨晚坐在克毅的车上，谈起以前的事。最近的我们很少说话，但是如果要聊起以前，他是更适合不过的人选了。跟他说话时，总会想起从前。并不是因为他很老，但只是因为我们俩经过了这么多，现在仍是朋友。虽然性格上差这么多，我们还是很了解彼此的。享受这样的谈话。a walk down memory lane.

a Song for u, my friend.

Vitamin C Graduation Song

And so we talked all night
About the rest of our lives
Where we're gonna be when we turn 25
I keep thinking times will never change
Keep on thinking things will always be the same
But when we leave this year
We won't be coming back
No more hanging out
Cause we're on a different track
And if you got something that you need to say
You better say it right now
Cause you don't have another day
Cause we're moving on and we can't slow down

These memories are playing
Like a film without sound
And I keep thinking of the night in June
I Didn't know much of love, but it came too soon
And There was me and you
And then it got real blue
Stay at home talkin' on the telephone and
We would get so excited, we'd get so scared
Laughing at our selves thinking life's not fair
And this is how it feels

Chorus:
As we go on, we remember
All the times we had together
A nd as our lives change, from whatever
We will still be, friends forever
So if we get the big jobs
And we make the big money
When we look back now,
Will that joke still be funny?
Will we still remember everything
We learned in school?
Still be trying to break every single rule
Will little brainy Bobby be the stockbroker man?
Can Heather find a job
That won't interfere with her tan?
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly
And this is how it feels

Repeat chorus
La, la, la, la; yeah, yeah, yeah
La, la, la, la, we will still be friends forever

Will we think about tomorrow
Like we think about now?
Can we survive it out there?
Can we make it somehow?
I guess I thought that this would never end
And suddenly it's like we're women and men
Will the past be a shadow that will follow us round?
Will these memories fade when I leave this town
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly

we r gonna walk thru this.

i wun say it's a tribulation. but i noe it's a frustration. n i noe, it's the devil.

n so this time round, i m going to be so focused.

i m going to be in Christ and in peace.

and i know, i will overcome my exams, overcome the obstacles.

becos..

all things work tog for the good of those who love Him.

and so..

all things r gonna work tog for me..

and for my cg E357.

it's gonna happen.

let hearts be revealed.

i wonder wad i need to do. i have been thinking. n i CANNOT afford to get distracted. but it seems, like 101 things that are coming in the way.

Ps 78:70-72

"He also chose David His servant, and took him from the sheepfolds; from following the ewes that had young He brought him, to shepherd Jacob His people and Israel His inheritance. So he shepherded them according to the integrity of his heart and guided them by the skilfulness of his hands. "


the desires of my heart.

it's such an awesome day for sleeping. i love the weather. recently i have become like a 宅女。i like staying at home really. :)

this is for you.

“说出来会被嘲笑的梦想，才有实践的价值。即使跌倒了，姿势也会很豪迈。” -九把刀

i have been thinking quite a bit. thoughts running thru my mind. anw i m really getting down to studying. wish me all the best.

i did it. i sat in front on my com from 530am till now leh. and finished my assignment. gosh i m soooo tired. but i m leaving hse in an hr. :) 3 cheers to xiaoting!

and one last assignment to go.

okkk. it's my turn to blog about night cycling. :)

if u realise, it's actually 730am in the morning. yes i woke up at 530 this morning to do my work. and i slept at 2 mind you. but this is all for procrastinating la. it's not becos xiaoting is hardworking.

anyway, abt night cycling.

unknown to many, i always wanted to go night cycling. yes although i m not that good at cycling. (and that is y i always have to cycle at ecp. so sad. cos i dun dare to cycle from m hse to ecp. i think i will be knocked down by a car or sth) and really, it was not so ez cycling on the main roads! i was trying so hard to manoeveur and at the same time trying to assure myself not to be scared. waahaha.

so really, i was quite happy cycling from ecp to changi village. it's so much easier to cycle cannn.

anw, if u wanna noe the details, jus read ying's blog la. i m lazy to re-narrate everything she said.

but main point is, we had a SLOOOWW time cycling from ecp to joo chiat becos terence said we shld go whampoa. i m quite glad we din though. i dunno how i would have survived the night.

and u can imagine how pissed weijian is when we stopped for bak kut teh after cycling for.. 15mins? haha. and he was so stunned until he refused to eat. (till i force him to of cos). haha. anw, it's xiaoting great idea for night cycling la. so i m responsible. and i m quite convinced, that next time nobody, at least not the guys will go night cycling with me again.

well the main trip goes, we cycled all the way to changi village, n it was a loooong ardous journey. the road that knows no end. but i really enjoyed myself on the way there. :) it's so nice cycling at that hour.

we ended up at changi village. it's ulu really. and while cycling back, i fell! crashed into a pillar ok? and it's the first time i fell becos of cycling. shooo sad. and the saddest thing is i sprained my last finger. n mind u, it's really the first time. it kinda hurts yest morning, and swelled like mad. but it's quite ok now la. and amazing ken said it's blue black. i woke up this morning.. and yes it's really blue black. i wanted to show u guys a pic of the blue-blackness but my cam on low batt and i m lazy! haha. n now i realise how impt ur pinkie is to u. it's super inconvenient. i can't even brush my teeth properly la.

and so after falling down, i really felt very sian plus the road is so difficult to cycle on! haix. n it rained. n after terence's non-stop persuading, we cabbed back. haha.

now...

apologies to weijian. :P sorry man. i think he must have been so heart-broken. cos he had such a great dream about us cycling all night, but yet we were so slow and we stop for bak kut teh! and we complained and whined... that we had to cycle so far and the poor boy had to bear with us. not that he has a choice la. one side is forest, the other side is runway. haaha. and appreciation for bringing us so far.

and to weijian n mx. we r so proud of u guys! the four of us r so ko ya.. coming back in a cab. but they braved the rain leh! n cycled back from tamp to ecp in like 45 mins. *we r proud of u say we r proud of u!* and i think it's a great thing that we din cycle back. we would have suffered like mad. they r our heroes for that day. :)

n so that is abt it.. i m still suffering after effects of my fall. but after such an eventful night, i came back, and BATHED, (this is very impt) and slept until 6pm.

i really did enjoy myself. n like wad i told terence, while we r young, we shld really just try everything. n i m glad i embarked on this trip. love u guys!

after note, i think the guys will refuse to go cycling with us anymore. so for the next trip, maybe we shld just stick to cycling n picnicking at ecp? haha.

pics another day k? i m getting back to doing assignments.

and i promised myself, after such an adventure. ireally nd to get down to mugging for the next 20 days. yes i can do it.

i have a feeling. i m not going to do so well for this exam. how???

i confess..

that i havent been faithfully studying.

and i feel that i have really lagged in my momentum. and to add on to that, i dun feel the urgency.

i dunno is it becos i m too free or wad.

but i m not feeling urgent.

and i nd to. becos exams r coming up in 6 days.

and i just got a horrible grade for my assignment. the same module for exam next wk.

the next time u see me, tell me to study. i nd to.

if not i m going to screw up this exam. and i dun wan to pull down my gpa.

and i m not as smart as u think i m.

Pst Kong on This is your day

http://www.bennyhinn.org/television/default.cfm?show=E3A20237E123B85271165A00E87871C5

weijian is going to love me for this i think.

for a change this time, i think jay chou's new album is really not bad!

i used to like him abit.. in the beginning with all those songs like 简单爱 and 龙卷风。but after that, i liked him a lot lesser n i used to get quite exasperated that everything is just so similar!

well, my personal perspective of him changed when i watched 不能说的秘密。

i wun say that the movie is 5 stars, but i know that for the first try, he did a fantastic job, and he is really talented. but for his music.. u noe...

and i m pleasantly surprised by 《我很忙》。

it did impress me really.

at least there is a change. n i like the latest cowboy image.

and i feel there is a bit of change in the music. though some things still remained the same.

BUT. at least i would bother to enough to really listen to this album. hee.

my fren sent me this quote. and i was really blessed by it.

everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial.

everything is permissible, but not everything is constructive.

u noe a lot of times, ppl will ask me, xt can i do this, xt can i do that..

y can't i do this.. y can't i do that..

i thought this quote really sums it up all.

and he ended the msg with.

do it all for the glory of God!

when i feel sad, somehow this song always cheer me up.

weird right? it's supposed to be a sad song. but there's sth special abt it.

ken will disagree, but i think it's a great song.

Beautiful Girls. (sorry peeps i can't put the original one up， jus listen k? haha)

i thought it is not so easy being a leader after all.

not that i once thought it was la.

but truth is, like wad fang said, there shld be a balance after all.

haix.

有时候，要做好人很难 hor?

that is y God i said, i need ur help and alot alot of wisdom. n no room for assumption.

i remembered what this person said that impacted me in a great way.

he said, no matter where u r,

remember WHAT you r doing, and WHY r u doing it.

I dunno y but this statement impacted me lots.

God i need your grace. Holy Spirit i need you to teach me.

Show me how to live
Teach me how to pray

i tried to sleep at 1130pm last night. but i could not. and i thought about it for a very long time. and finally, i got up, took my panadol and counted sheep. and i finally fell asleep.

This morning my alarm was set for 6am. i tried to sleep, but after seeing the msg, i could not sleep anymore. got up and typed a whole long thing because i could not talk.

My mouth hurts today. More than it did yest. and my heart is grieved today. more than it is yesterday.

my vision. to raise a new generation of disciples, who will LOVE GOD WHOLEHEARTEDLY, LOVE PEOPLE FERVENTLY. and LAY THEM THEIR LIVES FOR THE KINGDOM.

when we love God, we will love what He loves, we will love people, isn't it?

I SEE THE KING OF GLORY
COMING ON THE CLOUDS WITH FIRE
THE WHOLE EARTH SHAKES
THE WHOLE EARTH SHAKES

I SEE HIS LOVE AND MERCY
WASHING OVER ALL OUR SIN
THE PEOPLE SING
THE PEOPLE SING

HOSANNA
HOSANNA
HOSANNA IN THE HIGHEST

HOSANNA
HOSANNA
HOSANNA IN THE HIGHEST

I SEE A GENERATION
RISING UP TO TAKE THEIR PLACE
WITH SELFLESS FAITH
WITH SELFLESS FAITH

I SEE A NEAR REVIVAL
STIRRING AS WE PRAY AND SEEK
WE'RE ON OUR KNEES
WE'RE ON OUR KNEES

HEAL MY HEART AND MAKE IT CLEAN
OPEN UP MY EYES TO THE THINGS UNSEEN
SHOW ME HOW TO LOVE LIKE YOU HAVE LOVED ME
BREAK MY HEART FOR WHAT BREAKS YOURS
EVERYTHING I AM FOR YOUR KINGDOM'S CAUSE
AS I WALK FROM EARTH INTO ETERNITY

break my heart for what breaks yours.

let's rise up, with selfless faith

i m upset, frustrated and confused.

different people saying different things, opinions varying.

wad and who?

i dunno.

i knew that openness n transparency is the key.

n i want it to stay that way.

i want to have that trust n keep that trust.

i treasure it.

God, take us out of this. i really dun like it.

eugene's new hair. had lunch with him on monday.

a big thank you to my cg members! love u guys. really really appreciate the thought.

i forgot to say. my 2 latest wants.

1. xiao zhu's new book. i really really like it. and i believe in the principle of sowing and reaping.

2. xiao zhu's concert tix. i really wanna watch it. gee.

went to ms clarity cafe and had dinner with chan eng on wed. ate escargots for the first time! was literally forced by her. it tasted jus ok. not as gross as i imagine. haha.

but we had a great talk. n yes, my dear, the post was not intended for u. but it had an interesting effect though.

glad u told me all those stuff. love ya.

that's all for tonight. i m nice! haaha. to give u all an interesting updates. :)

recently i m just too lazy to blog. i noe.

my exams r coming. but really i dun have a sense of urgency. someone take a hammer n whack my head pls. **ZZzzzz**

过了这么多天，我昨天终于拿小猪的书来读。

fang说，我听起来像个比她还着迷的fans。我说，我不是粉丝。

喜欢小猪，不单单因为他会唱歌跳舞，喜欢他的谦卑，他的热情，他的冲刺。

我仰慕的，不是那些成功的人，而是那些曾经摔倒，再次爬上来的人。

是的。he's my inspiration.

所以我好想参加他第一次巡回售票演唱会。

在地铁上，我忍着眼泪。

到了最后一章，我哭了。

他说，亲情是他的弱点，我发现，这也是我的弱点。

尴尬的擦着眼泪。

心里说，小猪，谢谢你。

i forgot to add.

it's all about making a difference.

i was impacted by wad pst said on tues.

and i was so afraid to confront this.

but now. let's pray for it.

REvival.

i thought i had to blog sth. but i dunno wad. :)

had a nice dinner with chan eng on wed's night. ms clarity cafe is a nice place. i ate escargots! it's jus ok but the color looked gross. will update pics soon.

my exams is coming up very soon. gee. i m scared. (not really la.)

hmm.. i think that is abt all.

i noe this is a very nothing post. sry frens.

dear ken, jia you ok? n dun be so easily irritated la.

u write chinese beautifully too.

sun rocks.

i m really. very tired.

n i dunno y. but my mind is bogged down by cg, sch work, my life and i think that is abt enough for me to think.

and i dunno y. this sem i m kinda overwhelmed by sch work. it's not like i cannot handle it. but it does give me a certain amount of stress.

and everytime i hit the bed, i jus sleep on n on.

for all the stress in the day.

sorry that i din react well. i m really tired.

and i have exams in 3 wks time. and 1 more presentation. 2 more papers.

and i have many things i want to do. in the cg

yes xiaoting, tell urself, u can do it.

these guys r the ones i spend time with every weekend. they r such fun ppl to hang out with.
3 "hunks"? :P
身价不菲的weijian
i like this pic very much.
they look like 2 gangsters.

jian guang looks nice here! haah.
cute.
i wanted to capture this moment.
and i thot we shld have a picture of our dinner tog.

nice feel hor.

celebrating jeremy's birthday at east coast park. 12++ am. haah.

after our east coast challenge. do the guys look cool? i think so. :)

i like this pic. :) e357.
xue min is funny. ha.

3 times at ECP on 2 days. i guess that is quite crazy.

我需要突破。当我以为这场仗是稳赢了后，总会有突发状况。

我希望我不是孤独的。我不要孤军作战。

陪我一起好吗？

我们一起并肩作战。

the strangest thing happened.

i was trying to type an English essay. and i found it awfully difficult to do so. gee.

and after one full page, it was only 490 ENGLISH words.

when my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the Rock that is higher than i. :)

He gave me a verse. Ting, it's time to step out. Remember, having done all, to stand.

i may be going into hibernation. overhaul needed in my life.

look forward to a metamorphosized girl.

i hope it will happen. :)

very tempted to blog in chinese. but considering that most of u probably really cant understand, i m gonna compromise. i read a few blogs jus now, was feeling tired, wanted to catch "a few winks", but yet in the process became emo.

u noe during sot, pastor kong preached abt being a shepherd. and he said, one of the most impt things of a shepherd, is that he must be there for his sheep. as a leader and a pastor, pst kong said, u must be there for ur sheep. in times of crisis, in times of problems, u must be there for them. physically present.

and when he gave the altar call, i cried n cried n cried. becos i noe how it feels to be alone. n i rem, there i made a decision, i will be there for my sheep.

and that is y, i treasure it a lot when my members turn to me, cry over the phone, and ask me to help them. becos i think it's a priveilege. i think it's a trust.

and that is y, i have decided, that i want to be there. not just for my sheep, but for my frens as well. yes i wan u to noe, u can always turn to me, if u want to. and that's y i feel happy that ppl confide in me. becos it's a priveilege. becos that trust is precious.

to my frens n my members, i jus wan to say thank u. to those of u who trusted me and turned to me, i really m grateful. u din have to, but u did, and it is a priveilege to be your fren and to be your leader.

yulan wrote on her blog.

ppl come n ppl go.

i feel this so strongly in my life.

many have come and gone. i wonder, who will still be there?

以前，我抗拒。
现在，我发现，我不得不学着该如何接受。

i forgot to say. my 2 latest wants.

1. xiao zhu's new book. i really really like it. and i believe in the principle of sowing and reaping.
2. xiao zhu's concert tix. i really wanna watch it. gee.

yest. 2.5hrs of badminton. 15min of running. 45min of bball.

the feeling is...

shiok. beyond words.

i love it man. it din even feel like torture to exercise like that. it simply felt yummlicious. i wanna do that again.

i really dun think i want to think abt that issue.it's just not the time yet u noe?if i start,i probably wun stop.it's a stage for friendships.and the time will come.

today i read a quote that i really liked. to share with u.

One day i went out to find a friend,
But friends were nowhere to be found.
The next day i went out to be a friend,
and friends were everywhere.

Friends are seldom found, friends are usually made.

This is such a simple principle,yet so simply profound.

To have friends, my fren, you first must be a friend.

this is abt sth related, and prob not so related. sth in my heart.

someone asked me a few days ago, y m i close to certain ppl? why is it xiaoting always like to fellowship with some ppl? why is it no matter how tired and busy i am, i will definitely set time aside to spend time with some ppl? simply becos they r my frens.

my principle undergirding my friendships is very simple. i make friends sometimes becos they appear in my life at certain point of my life. Some ppl have become close to my heart becos they really pressed into my life. and these r ppl i really treasure. to me, tdy if u choose to open up ur life to me and press in, show me ur heart and "i will give u mine". i m willing to go the extra mile for u, becos friends r so impt to me.

i really treasure friendships. maybe because of the background that i grew up in, friendships has a special value in my life.

sth that i m scared of, when i pour out for a fren, and that is not reciprocrated. i totally dislike the feeling of valuing sth more than the opp party does. and when that happens, i will withdraw.

perhaps one day i may change. but for now.. it will probably be like that.

i forgot to add.

i had a great time today. u guys really light up my life.

tdy, we set off with a "huat ah!", and became "swee or!" along the way, slowly evolving to be "zai ah!", and end off the day, "cui-ed". if u noe wad i m toking abt.

i love my life.

i wanted to come home, change, pray and sleep, without switching on my com. but i failed. haha. i guess i have to blog abt this.

tdy's service was jus simply amazing. i love pst's msg. it jus put sth in me to get up and run all over again. and one of the best revelations i had tdy is..

our circumstance is jus a cycle of events. but the Bible said, having done all, to stand. many ppl get attached to their circumstances and go along with it. but our circumstances r jus cycles of events. we r not supposed to get attached to our circumstances and go along with it! but we r to stand firm on Christ our rock!

what a revelation!

so i shld not be attached to my hurts, disappointments, discouragements, failures.becos they r jus part of the cycle. but having done all, i must stand.

yes xiaoting!

the word encouraged me so much.

and i love u pastor for the great word.

and i love u God. for the timely word. You knew i needed this. thank you.

i m a happy girl.

i am enjoying my no 24 bus rides home. thanx. :)

as a leader, many times u will let ppl into ur life, but sooner or later, u will realise, as a person, pple come n go. frens come n go.

m i sad? definitely.

do i regret? no i don't.

like wad meiyan said, it is a priveilege to serve these ppl. and i agree so.

listening to her voice, watching her videos, tears flowed and flowed and flowed. i m so proud of u. hope that u can really feel it.

我要被这个assignment逼疯了。

今天上课发生了一件很劲爆的事，那就是蓝老师今天带他女朋友来上课，还我们一伙人都无法专心，因为我们花了好长时间在想，这个人到底是谁，而且不断揣测，结果老师还不是自己介绍她，哈哈。我们白下功夫。

虽然她看起来很小，但是，她看起来很聪明，在法国念书leh。真不愧是蓝老师的女朋友。。还在世界文化遗产保护中心工作，能讲一口流利的法语，真得很厉害。我实在很羡慕。

我有很多话想对你说，但是一见到你，却什么也说不出口。不知该说什么，不知该从何说起。

不知道从什么时候

我开始害怕信任

开始害怕付出

开始害怕做梦

不知从什么时候开始

我失去了飞翔的勇气

我需要找回 当初的勇敢。当初的理想。

我需要再次飞翔。

i m really not supposed to be blogging here. i m supposed to hold on dearly to my 台湾政治史and treat it like it's the most impt book after my bible. muahahaha.

今天，和往常一样，我真的不想再一次来上这堂课。奇怪的是，七点多我就睁开了眼睛，奇迹，我竟然这么早就醒了。想了想，我们去上课吧。虽然真的已经非常非常迟，但是，这一堂课让我感慨很多。突然我了解，为什么我身在南大，对南大的归属感也增加了一层。

记得，当初要来南大时，老师们似乎不赞成这个决定。他们对很多人，很多制度有意见。我也被他们稍稍的影响，带着某种偏见来到学校。直到现在，我还不知道老师们是否对，但是，突然间我觉得，这一点也不重要了。对我而言，最重要的，应该是，我从南大离开，带着满满的知识，满满的成长，满满新的思想，不管是什么制度，还是什么人，现在都已经没有这么重要了。

我很开心当初作了这个决定，更有种，嗯，晓亭，你对了的感觉。我想，我应该会更珍惜这一年半的时光。现在，还不会太迟吧。

i din noe y. but i promise, without understanding the situation, i still will do it. you did it all to protect me right? i still dun understand. how i can be so naive n gullible at times. and i still think i am. and i still think, it's really not the time yet. till i learn.

信任和不信任之间，这条线在哪里？
保护自己和接纳别人之间，这条线在哪里？

i hope u r not like wad i think u r. i hope that 我没有看错你，好吗？i hope that u r different. really.

i was supposed to stay up and study, then wake up for lesson.

and guessed wad?

i slept like nobody's business.

xiaoting y r u so tired?

i have no idea.

thank you.

it made everything worthwhile.

i m glad. so glad.

i feel misunderstood.

i feel like wad i want to say is not conveyed, or ppl r not catching it.

我觉得我有满肚子的苦水，我不知道要往哪里吐。

我多么希望你会明白，it's really not about me, it's about ur relationship with God.

i wish u will just get it.

昨天在和fang讲话，讲到很迟，but i felt it was a fruitful conversation. :)

正好在想，前一阵子，我真的还蛮失落的。

或许有时候，得到的，和预期的不一样，会让人有种莫名的失落感。

那段时期我很不开心，不是因为你所做的事情，而是我非常惊讶，为什么这么快，就有人能代替我们在你心目中的位子？

我并不介意你交朋友。。但是，那种被人替代的滋味，很不好受。直到今天，我还是这么觉得的。

我一直觉得联络少了，沟通少了，或许你没有察觉吧，但我总是认为，有人慢慢的，在你的生命中，取代了我们。

或许我太严格，太苛刻了。我也不知道。但是，总有一种失落感。

你知道吗？如果今天换成是别人，我早就走了。但是我很珍惜我们的友谊，很珍惜我们之间的共同回忆，才会按捺住这种心情，继续和你联络。

one thing that i really dun like, is that sth matters to me, more than it matters to u. really, if it was somebody else, i would have withdrawn. but becos it is you. n you have pressed into my life. and for that, i m willing to press in once more. but i dunno for how long.

i jus hope, things can go back to what it is before. can it?

dear fren,

somebody told me, it's just a passing phase. n i certainly do hope so. i did mention to u, that things seem to be "less happening" around us then before, and it seems like u r more willing, and happier spending time with ur new found frens. i really dun mind. but like wad i said, i felt like i m being replaced. yes, u have issues and problems to settle, i know that, and i really dun mind that. i wish u will know that. but i m just sad that u dun seem to turn to us anymore, and u dun seem to treasure us as much as before. have we become less impt? i suddenly feel so.

i dun wan to be emo in dealing with this issue, but i m disappointed, and that is a fact. i dun wan to tell u, becos i dunno what u will think and how it will affect u, and i dun wan u to be affected. but that, my fren, cannot change the fact that i m really kinda sad about this whole thing. it seems like we lost that transparency and closeness, but i do hope we can get it back. and i wish, u will press into my life once more, just like how u did, right from the beginning.

love,
xiaoting

爱上听华语流行歌。在电脑上播放着许多歌曲，让我有着一种抒情的感觉。重新爱上华语流行音乐。

友人问我，不听英语歌的吗？不是不听，是少听吧。华语歌曲有种亲切感，有种贴近我的心的感觉。

刚读完sammi的专访，发现原来他也是基督徒。很开心。我一直都很喜欢她和郑秀珍，更开心她们也认识上帝。well i will see them in heaven one day! haha.

now i realised.

certain things, when MY shared with me abt it, i could not really understand. somehow it's all beginning to come to light. i think i m really beginning to understand.

associations. is so impt.

u r kinda missed. come back soon.

and happy 21st birthday lim yang.

get married ya?can't wait to see minyi in a gown.hee.

had a good time hanging out with sam n pam last night though. watched nanny diaries. the show that i desperately want to watch. but i thot it was a let down. other than chris evans. but i only saw him like 3 times in the movie. haaha. it was a weird combination, sam pam n me. but sam was very nice la. and i thot the HK cafe was not bad too.

and it's amazing to see how SMU transformed a person. i m quite happy to be slacking in NTU. haha.

Faith is getting up everytime u r knocked down.

this word struck me when i was giving bs. instead of me trying to bless my member and share a word with him, i felt like i was preaching to myself instead.

i felt like i had the wind knocked out of me. n i need strength n determination to get up.

but i m determined not to stay knocked down. i will do everything i can.

i will get up again.

see me soar.

劉畊宏-幸福的距離MV

i like this song so much.

最近一直在听很多华语歌。爱上了刘耕宏《幸福的距离》。

《幸福的距离》


窗外开始下起毛毛雨
云遮住了星星
夜深了还没有睡意
翻来覆去的想你
时钟滴答滴答的声音
像在说我爱你
转过2点3点到6点
恨不得快点见到你

幸福的距离 就算万公里
在你眼里有我想要勇气
从南极飞到北极 南京到北京
你的笑胜过那些美景
我们勾勾手 就一言为定
我会傻傻的好好的爱你
你的名加我的姓
永远在一起
拥抱多过千言万语

last night i was talking to a fren. perhaps the fact that i worked in insurance company before, i can detect that tone.

not that i dun like my fren, or my boss, which in fact on the contrary, both of them taught me a lot of things, but somehow, i just DON'T have a good feeling abt insurance. No offense to all my frens who r advisors k, cos u guys r great ppl. N i will probably need ur help one day.

But it's frustrating that early in the morning u r woken up by a call from AIA head office, and having another advisor seeing u in an hour's time.

somehow, it's just a phobia of insurance.

Your Birthdate: July 28

You have a Type A personality so big it makes other Type A's shrink away in shame.You never shy away from adversity - and you love to tackle impossible problems.Failure is not an option for you, and more than a few people are put off by your ego.You tend to be controlling, and you hate leaving anything up to chance. Your strength: Your bold approach to life Your weakness: You don't accept help Your power color: Bronze Your power symbol: Pyramid Your power month: October

纳闷

忽然觉得很纳闷。不要问我为什么，我自己也不知道。就觉得很纳闷就对了。

好像一个大闷锅。

blogging.

这次看了爱情魔法师，感觉是很不同的。或许因为常常这样子看戏，所以现在比较懂得抽离，所以不会“困”在其中。但是看了戏后，感触挺多。

写一些下来吧。

其中一个影响我最深的，就是戏里小贝说的一句话。

人活着就是为了一个梦。

这戏的重点或许是小贝和杜亚斯的恋情，但我看来，让我感动最深的，还是小贝追求她的梦，而最终她成功。这一点，真的深深地打动了我。

人活着，就是为了一个梦。

昨天祷告的时候，这句话不停的重复在我脑海里。

我活着的原因是什么？为了怎样的一个梦？

an excerpt from pst phil's book "leadership excellence".

i thought it was brilliantly written. sharing with u.

"There will always be people we are called to serve, who we help to accomplish their purposes. Mentoring is vital to success. However, this involves more than just chatting with a more experienced person. The mentoring relationship is opened up through serving. People sometimes ask me to mentor them. All they need do is to help me do what I do and they'll find themselves in my world. They learn more by serving than by any other means. A good 'mentee' makes a great mentor. No matter how good a person's coach might be, if the person has no heart to serve and to learn, then they will fail to be coached."

i thought this is excellent. be blessed by it.

经过了这么多事，我学习了很多，所以真正能够影响我的事情不多。但是，最近我的心情一直起伏不定，我好不容易维持的坚持好像要被动摇了。

人生有很多要与不要，该与不该，而我总是徘徊在这些之间。我该做什么，不该做什么。。而当然面对的最大矛盾也是这个。有时候，我好希望前面要走的路，可以是这么清楚，清晰，让我在没有危险，犹豫之下走下去。

这也当然是不可能的。

我很需要改变一些东西。

不喜欢生活的一成不变。

救命啊

有人觉得，打仗最重要的就是气势。

我觉得，我今天少了气势。

今天的仗没打好。

对不起。

有一点sad

was just telling jeremy i love the way my life is and the way my cg is now. and i was trying to encourage to look on the bright side of things.

and now my mind is plagued with the bad side of things.

all things work tog for the good of those who love Him, to those who r the called according to His purpose.

warning: this is an emo post.

晓亭总是让人感觉好坚强，因为小时候，妈妈曾说，亭，你不可以让人看到你的脆弱。

从小到大，没有几个人看到妈妈的脆弱，就像现在，也不会有几个人看到我脆弱的时候。

可能是我的童年，让我讨厌无助感。

但是刚才，那五分钟的戏，让我不停的哭。

不停的哭，不停的哭

坚强是一个必要
但是有这么多的时候，我希望，会有人看到我坚强后的脆弱。

现在已经是凌晨4点多钟了，我真的很少这个时间睡觉。其实还蛮好的，因为经过了几个月的训练，我开始比较早睡。哈哈。

其实想写一些东西，只是脑子挺空白的。

下个星期，我放假了！

我真的觉得我需要休息。

休息是为了走更长远的路。

希望在忙功课之余，我能够好好的休息。

很奇怪，这个学期感觉自己好忙啊！也不知道在忙些什么，但总感觉我的功课真的好多。

晓亭，加油吧！

我的朋友- 这段时间，我体会到，什么是无声胜有声。不是我不要说，说了你又不听。很讨厌我们之间有隔阂，但有时却觉得很无奈，也真的没有想要去做什么。

my friend - it's ur life. and i dun have a right to tell u how u should live it. my prayer is that u will love Him more and more, and fulfil ur destiny in ur life.

其实要说的东西还有很多，但是在这里说不出来，或许这是少数的一次，我会把它们埋在心里，不说出来了。

to YOU!

i have always thought that u r talented since jc days. for what i see on the outside, what i read is so entirely different, but somehow sth told me that u were someone really special.

it was exciting to read all those stories, hear all those things, and even more so to decipher what u wrote.

and i saw those pics and witnessed those smiles. perhaps u would never noe who i am, but i just want to say..

wishing u happiness.

your girl is lucky to have u, and from what i see, u r lucky too.

祝你们永远幸福。

我发现到一样事情。i am an open book. that means that what i feel, i will tell. i hate bottling things up.

有时候我很羡慕那些能把心情用许许多多文字藏起来的朋友。那么，他们就可以随心所欲的道出他们的心情，而不必害怕别人会发现。

我就不一样了。

现在的感觉，我会很想写下来，但是由于观众你在这，我要学习自我审查。(self censorship)

这个周末有点恐怖，除了有很多仗要打之外，心情的起伏更是让我乱了手脚。我已经很久都没有这么多感触了。

好消息是 我打了一场漂亮的胜仗。我们在突破了。

现在需要调整心情，蓄势待发。

今天终于看了881。

心情还是起伏不定。

你什么时候才会静下来呢？

THESE R MY BELOVED SOT FRENS. AND BBD PHOTOS. SORRY I M LAZY.

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